iHome 2.7.1 is a beautiful elegant theme, it’s the current theme I am actually using. The theme however does have some complexities to setting up and what not, but once done, it’s a masterpiece to show off. Any one who has an iPhone will see this theme on your phone, and say “How in the hell?”

However you are restricted a bit with this theme, and you must always keep things clean with the “Categories” app from Cydia. This theme could be customizable if you’re comfortable with SSH’ing into your phone. If you like simplicity and elegance, and don’t mind keeping everything in two folder (like myself), this theme could suit you well!

....but this thing scares the shit out of me! This is an expertly Photoshopped picture of some kind of animal creature named Max. According to The Sun, Max is Britain's perfect pet! Max is also a perfect nightmare!

So, Scientists pushed aside less important projects like "finding a cure for cancer" and "finding out what exactly made Britney Spears lose her fucking marbles" to study what makes the perfect pet. They took to the streets and asked 2,000 people what kind of traits they look for when choosing an animal friend. Based on those results, they came up with this!

Max has the ears of a rabbit, the face of a cat, the body of a golden retriever and the tail of a horse. Max sleeps for 9 hours a day and he loves taking walks. And he will probably suck the life out of your soul when you sleep.

You know, they should've asked my ass what traits I look for in a perfect pet. The perfect pet to me is one who doesn't piss on my shoes, who doesn't bark when I have a hangover and who will go out and get a job so it can support my ass. Can Max do all that? If so, send me two of him and I'll find a way to deal with his creepy looks.

It has been a long ass time since we have heard any crazy stories about Britney Spears. She hasn't shaved her head, went commando, spoke in a British accent, been comitted, or banged a paparazzo in almost two years.Well apparently after Britney's Circus Tour is donzo this November, papa Spears could be setting her free. I don't know if I can be on board with a Papa Spears freed Britney. This bitch is going to wild out more than a preacher's daughter at college.

But wait, does this mean that she will stop showering and being disgusting Britney with the pink wig again? Because if it does, then I am not on board. I like my Britney clean and wig free. I don't even mind her ratty weave. I just hope that the judge takes this concern into consideration. Maybe I need to write his ass a letter. Hmmmmm......

Anyway, I'm sure everything will be fine (not really).... and I'm sure that she has seen the errors of her past ways (no she hasn't)..... and I think that this will be a positive thing (for Star Magazine) But only time will tell...

Well, Ashley's housewarming was this past weekend and she received two of satans workers gnomes. I am getting extra security for my room immediately. I'm talking lasers and maybe even a deadbolt on my door. And fuck windows! I am going to brick that shit shut for life. They aren't the kind of gnomes that carry weapons, but that doesn't matter! The first one may look innocent but shortly after that picture was taken he decapitated that bird and ate his head, and the other one looks like a scary ass demon and he fucking is! They will be starring in my nightmares for a long, long time.

How lazy can people really get? I mean I thought that the segway was the final straw, you know being that it is the official vehicle of obesity. But no, we have the comfort wipe! Just in case you can't hold fucking toilet paper in your motherfucking hand, we now have a stick to hold it for you. Why would I need this, you may ask. Well, let me tell you why! YOU DON'T! Grab the toilet paper, hell even get you some ass wipes, and wipe your ass like a regular person!!! If I ever go in someone's house and see this contraption, I am going to beat the shit out of them with it, then they can wipe the shit I beat out of them off of their lazy ass with their fucking comfort wipe.

Can I please go one fucking day without hearing something about this dumb twat? I swear to silicone I read or see something about her every day, and I think its time for this shit-train to come to a complete stop and let this bitch off. I remember the days when you were "famous" because you were talented, not because you had no talent and detachable body parts.

Anyskank, apparently this bitch is going to be in Playboy in September. Now this I can be on board with! This is where dumb, blond, talentless hoebags with fake boobies belong. Not on TV, or trying to make music, or on the cover of regular magazines with no plastic cover. I'm glad she has finally decided to embrace her fate as a silent piece of eyecandy for millions of horny men around America. But if she tries so sing or act, RUN!

So I am always registering to win pointless crap. Because let's face it, I am one cheapskate bitch and I love me some free shit. But I never win. Ever. Well, today I got an email telling me that I had won a prize that I had registered for like a month ago.... I thought it was a scam until I went and saw that I had in fact won! I won a brand new Moxi DVR with a lifetime subscription anddd a lifetime subscription to Google Voice Mobile! I am so damn excited!

Not impressed with this album at all. I was expecting a little bit more of something, but its just not there at all. Its time for them to hang it up. I did like Imma Be, Missing You, and I gotta Feeling and I still think Boom Boom Pow is just ok... Decide for yourself and let me know what you think.

Black Eyed Peas - The E.N.D. (The Energy Never Dies)

Track List:

Disc 1:
01. Boom Boom Pow 5:08
02. Rock That Body 4:28
03. Meet Me Halfway 4:44
04. Imma Be 4:16
05. I Gotta Feeling 4:48
06. Alive 5:02
07. Missing You 4:34
08. Ring-A-Ling 4:32
09. Party All The Time 4:43
10. Out Of My Head 3:51
11. Electric City 4:08
12. Showdown 4:27
13. Now Generation 4:06
14. One Tribe 4:40
15. Rockin To The Beat 3:45

Disc 2: Bonus CD
01. Where Ya Wanna Go 05:08
02. Simple Little Melody 03:12
03. Mare 02:56
04. Dont Bring Me Down 03:12
05. Pump It Harder 03:52
06. Lets Get Re-Started 02:57
07. Shut The Phunk Up 04:20
08. Thats The Joint 03:48
09. Another Weekend 04:11
10. Dont Phunk Around 03:47

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1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often.
3. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.
4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.
6. Unless you are served in a frosted glass, never come within 4 feet of my lips.
7. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
8. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
9. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
10. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good.
11. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
12. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
13. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
14. Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it.
15. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
16. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
17. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
18. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
19. It ain’t the jeans that make your butt look fat.
20. There is a very fine line in dating between ‘being picky’ and ‘being alone forever’
21. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
22. A person who is nice to you but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
23. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.
24. Never lick a steak knife.
25. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
26. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

How funny is this shit? I saw this picture and about peed my pants. Apparently, Heidi and Spencer are on this season of I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here. They sure are playing it fast and loose with the word celebrity these days. Anyway, these douches have made it through 2 days of filming and have quit that bitch twice already. They are upset over the living conditions they are being "forced" to stay in annnnnd get this, they think that the other celebs that are on the show are very low caliber. Wait, the OTHER celebs are low caliber? Who do they have on there? Who is seriously lower caliber than Heidi and Spencer?! Also, Heidi was heard saying that they could have at least got a real celebrity, like K-Fed on the show. Hahahahahahaha..... I'm just going to leave it at that.

Well, I was watching the MTV Movie Awards, minding my own business and saw Megan Fox and thought 3 things:

• Why does her hair have jizz in it?
• When is she going to shower?
• What the fuck is going on with her eyebrows?

Now, I honestly think that Megan Fox is hot, normally, but here lately she has been looking like one of Paris Hilton's disease infested crabs. I don't know what kind of magic mirror she is looking in, but I am going to Target to get a full-length mirror for this bitch to see herself in. Anyway, I'm just hoping that this bitch gets off of this trip, and goes back to being hot like we expect her to be. This is just unacceptable.

So the Hills finale was a little anti-climatic since we all know that Heidi and Spencer were getting married, that Lauren was gonna show up, and that Kristen Cavalirri (I don't think I spelled that right but who gives a shit) was going to be the new leading lady of the show. But it was still full of drama and excitement and I am glad that Lauren got out when she did because the show is getting to be a little Sanfordesque. Everybody sleeping with each other... the ridiculous drama.... the skanks.... wait a minute.... are we sure these hoes aren't from Sanford? Because I think I know some of them.

Anyvaltrex, next season starts this fall and I will not be tuning in. Just kidding. I will be tuning in, and watching every moment. I can't stop. I have been trying for years. I have just decided to be ok with it. Don't judge my ass, because we all know that all TV these days is trashy and horrible. Buuuuutttt, don't think that just because I watch the Hills that I'm not classy. Because I also watch Keeping up with the Kardashians and that is the classiest show on television, hands down.

Glee is a new show on FOX that I have fallen in love with. A couple of weeks ago I TiVoed this show and let me tell you, I was impressed. I've watched it all the way through twice and have re-screened the performance numbers more times than I can count. It's becoming a little ridiculous. I may have to join some kind of support group. The series, which centers around a outcast-filled high school glee club, completely won me over. But it's the performance scenes that truly keep me coming back. My favorite is a cover of Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'." I even downloaded that shit to my computer and my iPod. You'll have to tune in this fall to see what I mean, because the pilot episode was pretty damn awesome. Go to Hulu and check it out! And after you do let me know what you think about it. The trailer is below. Doesn't it just fill you with, well, glee?

Just when you thought the world was safe from evil hoes, Marilyn Manson shows his scary ass face again... I haven't ever figured out why in the world he was famous/popular when I was in middle and high school. There were girls in my class that would give their right tit for him. So I remember looking his ass up online to see what the fuss was about, and thinking "are they really talking about this skinny pale ass white fucker?" It was all lost on me, and I like all music to a degree. And I do I have to admit some of his songs are catchy, but this mofo is creepy. I just don't get it. Anymissingribs, here he is on Thursday in NYC being creepy. Apparently, he is working on new music.... Imma need him to work on a new look, I mean he is almost 50 and this shit just isn't working for him anymore. (Not that it ever worked for him) He still looks like Paul Pfeiffer from The Wonder Years.

Multi-platinum band 311 is pleased to announce that their highly anticipated new album, Uplifter, will be released on June 2. Uplifter is the band's first studio record in three years and was produced by the legendary Bob Rock. As the title suggests, the band's new album is an uplifting collection of 311's trademark blend of rock & reggae; elevated by inspired songwriting, dynamic musicianship and big anthemic choruses. A deluxe edition of Uplifter will include a special DVD documentary, "The Road to 311 Day," directed by Wayne Price. The documentary, including interviews, backstage footage and live performances, follows the band and their fans for the week leading up to the 3-11 Day concert event in New Orleans in 2008.


Tracklist
---------
01. Hey You 3:55
02. Its Alright 3:35
03. Mix It Up 2:54
04. Golden Sunlight 4:29
05. India Ink 3:38
06. Daisy Cutter 3:54
07. Too Much Too Fast 3:52
08. Never Ending Summer 4:05
09. Two Drops In The Ocean 3:47
10. Something Out Of Nothing 4:24
11. Jackpot 3:53
12. My Heart Sings 4:21

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So I am just going to lay it all on the line: I saw ‘Wolverine’ last night and although it isn't an epic revolution, it is fun and should be seen if for no other reason then to get the bad taste of all the other new shitty movies (with the exception of Obsessed) out of your mouth. With that being said, I did enjoy the movie and will probably see it again...

In my opinion the origin story of Wolverine comes across pretty well. Starting with him as a child and finding out who is real father is that also makes Victor his brother. One of the really great scenes in the film is the opening credits which show Logan and Victor fighting through 4 wars spanning the course of 100 years.

A big complaint of my friend Ashley was that in the previous X-Men movies is that Gambit was missing from them, well worry no more bitches, Taylor Kitsch is here and does a killer job portraying Remy LeBeau. In the movie he is an former prisoner of 3 mile island and is the only mutant to ever escape, thus he is also the only one that knows how to get back. When Logan catches up with him they are playing poker on bourbon street. After Logan does a great job of pissing him off, we get to see our first glimpse of the flaming playing cards which Gambit uses to readily handle him.

Even though they used a lot of makeup and some CGI to portray Fred Dukes once he becomes The Blob, the scenes of him and Logan boxing are ridiculously awesome... and the fight scene @ the end was SICK!

For me when I go to see a comic book movie I am looking for a fun and entertaining experience. It also helps if there is a lack of cheesiness, good effects, and great action. When I walked out of ‘Wolverine’ thats how I felt, and all in all I really enjoyed the movie, it isnt the greatest superhero movie of all time but it gets us back to a comic book movie that isnt completely garbage.

So, me and Ashley were hellbent on seeing the Wolverine movie (I know that is not the title of the movie, but that's what I am fucking calling it) on opening night... Well, Ashley is a fucking genius and decided to get us tickets @ the Epicentre in Charlotte, instead of a regular theater.

First, let me tell you that downtown Charlotte makes downtown Raleigh look like the slums. It's clean and everything looks NEW. Back to my story.

We get downtown and find the Epicentre, which we find out is this awesome open air mall in the middle of downtown Charlotte that has restraunts and stores that were open when we got out of the movie... at midnight. Also, it has its own parking deck with free parking if you save your movie stub, otherwise it's $10. So it other words, save your fucking stub.

Anyfart, we walk through the awesomeness, and get to the theater, which has a velvet rope outside and looks like a club. The guy at the door asks us for our IDs and I was confused until I realized that you have to be 21 to get into the theater after a certain time. Which means no dumbass kids in the theater ruining my moviegoing experience!!! That alone was worth the extra $2 the ticket costs!

Then we get inside, and this shit IS a fucking club! The music was BLASTING and there was a bar, dance floor, and lounge. YES PLEASE. ANDDDDD it is joined with Mez restuaraunt and you can order REAL food to eat during the movie. You also can order a drink from the bar to enjoy with your movie as well!

As we walked into the theater part, we noticed that there aren't movie posters of upcoming movies... but flatscreens with the movie trailers playing on them! So we keep walking and get into the theater..... the seats are HUGE, they rock, and there was at least a foot and a half between me and the people sitting beside us. Not to mention our seat was like a sofa and had huge arm rests, to hold the plates and drinks.

This place has ruined all other theaters for me. It is totally worth the extra 2 bucks, and I will be going to see the new Transformers movie on opening night there too. I fucking love Charlotte.

Also: The movie was SICK!!! But I'll blog about that later....