It's Teddy fucking Ruxpin!!!

I seriously was so excited when I read that Teddy Ruxpin was making a triumphant return to the world this year! I used to play with that little fucker when I was little like it was my destiny. Plus, my brother thought he was creepy cause he talked, so that made him even more awesome. He went with me everywhere I fucking went. And then he would run out of batteries and I would throw his ass in the darkest back corners of my closet... and my mom would get new batteries in that bitch and we would be best friends again.

So apparently, the bitches that make Teddy Ruxpin back in the day are making his comeback kind of like Britney's comeback. They are giving his ass a makeover and then they are getting the top children's book writers together for all his new stories. I just hope that he keeps his clothes on and that he doesn't have any wardrobe malfunctions while on his world tour. I mean, as funny as it was to hear Britney proclaim that her pussy was hanging out... I don't think I am ready to hear Teddy say that his bear bits are hanging out.

Well, at least we can be glad that children will be playing with something educational instead of some of the stupid shit I see in Wal-Mart these days. I mean, we KNOW that this bitch can even run a country for 8 years... I mean he did give Dubbya all of his ideas you know. If you look closely at any picture of Dubbya you will see Teddy Ruxpin hanging out of his suitcase or waving out of the window of Air Force One. As a matter of fact, I think its time for Ruxpin for President in 2012. YES HE CAN!